Canon

As far as I have been able to discern, all fiction ever created exists in the same canon, and I'm not certain I can be convinced otherwise. Thus reading a book or watching a movie has, for me, added urgency. I paced while watching 1995's Clueless, knowing that a young Paul Rudd is only two years from incineration at the hands of Skynet - that was, until the old John Connor sent back the T-800 to save a young John Connor from the T-1000. Didn't turn out great in the long run, though.

It gets kind of confusing when you factor in the idea that somehow Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice and the more recent update Pride and Prejudice Zombies somehow have to exist contemporaneously, with plots that have implications on one another. Honestly, I find a concept as difficult as this much easier to wrap my head around then trying to keep track of the hundreds of thousands of independent timelines created by various writers throughout the centuries.

This renders tone completely irrelevant, and makes lots of works enjoyable on a whole different level. "Top Gun" is still pretty much "Top Gun," but now at least some of the fighter jocks at Miramar went to Annapolis with Pete "Dead Meat" Thompson and Lt. Topper Harley. I mean, just because they wouldn't let you-know-who into the Academy because he's Pete Mitchell's kid, doesn't mean that Tom Kazansky didn't have Jim "Washout" Pfaffenbach as his lab partner in plebe-killer chemistry. Hell, now that I think about it, they probably had Dr. Jack Ryan as their history teacher. Pretty rad when Samuel L. gave him that "Purple Target," I wonder if they still talk about that at reunions...

In other news, my girlfriend finally made me watch Gossip Girl, and I am happy to see that this Chuck Bass character is making it okay to be a dandy again.

Not to mention I am skeptical of all the hullabaloo over this ad campaign, as everyone I went to college with is fully aware that the most interesting man in the world is (by a wide, wide margin) the one-time chaplain of our alma mater. The Chaplain's exploits include (in no particular order):

-Swimming at the Berlin Olympics
-Traveling in a Zeppelin
-Getting arrested with Martin Luther King, Jr.
-While in the military, ditching his unit for a day and avoiding its mysterious fate
-Also while in the military, accidentally sinking a U.S. destroyer. ZOOPS

So, suck it Dos Equis.

Also, let me just say that I know plenty about the concept of Filibustering, thanks to The Source. However, before I did such research, the brilliant poetry of the idea of filibustering and what I imagined to be its creation was staggering. What happens if a guy staggers a little bit? Do people start to freak and psych him out? Do congressmen sense their coworker going for the filibuster, and try to sheepishly sneak out before he begins? Do they lock the doors? Do congressmen know it's coming when they see aides go to lock the doors? Is there a secret signal? YES so many thoughts. The idea that someone's power of sweeping oratory and rhetorical gesture and pure intestinal fortitude can grind the wheels of a bicameral legislature to a halt! If we imagine that this was a purely American invention, who came up with it? Was this some sort of concession to Adams? DID THE FOUNDERS NOT FORESEE ITS TERRIBLE POWER??

And that is all.