Also, Football

Apparently there was a big soccer (football) game a few days ago.

Dear Americans, can we agree to stop talking about this like we understand it? I'm pretty sure the average seven year old ANYWHERE ELSE IN THE WORLD understands European League Whatever Soccer better than the most educated of us, so let's butt out, lest we sound foolish.

Dear Europeans, we will try and ruin stuff like this for you. Sorry about that. If you're good sports about it, we'll send you Lady GaGa, and take back Madonna.