yeah, why can't them?

going to try to keep this short, because technically i am "at work", but i gotta hand it (once again) to my favorite lesbian couple, Pincus and Livadas, for introducing me to a dirty, crowded, crazy, Phillied-out underbelly of Adams Morgan i had no idea even existed. i've probably walked past Ventnor Bar approximately a million times (it's right past the best place to spend Euros in the city) and never even noticed it. but when i showed up last night, with the giant GO PHILLIES sign out front and the Phils up two runs to zip in the bottom of the second, it was the place to be. i haven't been to a bar that crowded since the debacle that was the Skins playoff game at the Crystal City Sports Pub last winter. i wasn't even planning on going hard last night, but when a guy twice your size presses a delicious mystery shooter (tasted like Snapple?) into your hand and admonishes you with a "IT'S THE F%$*ING PHILLIES ABOUT TO WIN THE F*&%ING WORLD SERIES!!!", what can you do?

(disclaimer: i don't actually advocate drinking any random thing any random guy gives you at any random bar in adams morgan [or anywhere], but my friends knew the guy, and anyway, this was a special occasion! ...meaning i didn't get roofied. at least i don't think i did.)

anyway, it was nuts. McMonagle, this is your kind of place. if anyone's looking for a place to (hopefully) (rain, rain, go away) finish out the Series tonight, Ventnor is it. (but get there early, else you'll be on your [soon to be Yuengling-soaked] feet all night.)

next stop, nerdsville

how many of us have heard/told this story before over lunch "if it wasn't for my roommate/landlord/neighbor's dog barking/pounding hangover waking me up this morning, i'd probably still be in bed?" well, today the roommate slept in, the landlord kept to himself, the neighbor doesn't even have a dog, and i was blissfully nonhungover, so... i woke up to birds chirping and my alarms having been sounding totally unheeded for 3+ hours. so i did what any respectable federal employee would do... eschewed the idea of peeling myself out of bed to slog to work half-a-day late in the rain and instead called in (cough, cough) sick.

two hours, three cafe au laits, and several none-too-(or perhaps way-too-)successful attempts at making eyes at probably-gay guys (damn you, Andrew Sullivan!) at Tryst later, i came across this on page 22 of The Stuff of Thought:

" Many other kinds of speech are interpreted in ways that differ from their literal meaning:

'If you could pass the guacamole, that would be awesome.'

'We're counting on you to show leadership in our Campaign for the Future.'

'Would you like to come up and see my etchings?'

'Nice store you got there. Would be a real shame if something happened to it.'

These are clearly intended as a request, a solicitation for money, a sexual come-on, and a threat. But why don't people just say what they mean?... 'Gimme the guacamole,' and so on?"

anyway, the analysis is interesting, but I'll spare you it for now (or save it for you to read on your own... i just discovered you can read this guy on Google Books if that's the kind of thing you're into). but aside from the weirdness that is a guy coming on to you with etchings, it reminded me a lot of a conversation had yesterday whilst enjoying a cornucopia of cheap beers at The Raven (Bud heavy for me, Sierra Nevada for 'zette, and the Champagne of Beers for Ashkan-joon). Chris wanted to say something about the activist ads all over Metro Center, and he started the train of thought by saying, "hey, have you guys ever been to Metro Center? ...i mean, i know you have, but i don't know any other way to start this story." (or something along those lines.)

ANYWAY, i think this is sort of exactly what Pinker talks about when he says "...ordinary conversation is like a session of tete-a-tete diplomacy, in which the parties explore ways of saving face, offering an "out" and maintaining plausible deniability..." i haven't gotten to chapter 8 where he really digs into this yet, but the point is, the fact that this exact conversational event happened to me last night, and then I read a linguistic analysis of it this morning can only mean one of two things:

1.) Ashkan is both a spy and a time-traveller, travelled to the future, saw me shirking work and reading this book, then travelled back to last night, lulled my senses with the King of Beers, and coolly passed all this off as a chatty non sequitur, when it was really part of a conspiracy to further my blind faith in books, or

2.) The Raven is the kind of transcedent place where Janis Joplin tunes and $3 Stellas cause the fabric of space-time and the pseudo-intellectual mishmash of friends to become interwoven into some sort of fantastical vortex of perfection. i'm no scientist of the magical arts here (unlike our friend pictured at left) but I'm leaning towards the second one because i think it gives me a metaphysical excuse for not going to work.

on a totally unrelated note, i want to throw in a quick plug for how awesome NPR podcasts are. if you're a 35-year-old trapped in a 20-something's body like myself, they're a find. personal favorites include All Songs Considered (thanks Pincus for introducing me to this!) and Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. they're great and easy to use, even if you're a phony like me, and feel totally ridiculous even using the word 'podcast' as i have essentially no idea what it means, how it works, or why it doesn't take up more space on your iPod. and unfortunately, there's absolutely no way of finding out answers to such questions...

wait...im still up!

so this is officially my first blog. it's probably way saltier than yours is

no but for real reals all of you out there have got to know by now that i have had nothing to do with the technical side of this blog...that would of course be my robot roommate mrs. jocelyn withmybymyself. but i just wanted to get a few words in before i pull a danielle and disappear into the woods for a week...

in keeping with what joce has already started, here are the top 5 things i'm feeling at the moment which as everyone knows will probably have changed once i resurface

1. bikes. ok i know, i know. this one was totally predictable and not anything new but i just feel in terms of the current state of the things everywhere they make sense and people/institutions all over are starting to catch on. i could say so much more, but i'll stop there.

2. this one also not a huge shocker but i really really think that rachel maddow has got a good thing going with the 9 o'clock slot on msnbc...and you know how i feel about any other network than abc. not only has she managed to get twice as many viewers for the 9 o'clock than her predecessor Dan Abrams, she has also on several occasions pulled higher ratings in the 25-54 age group than that old guy with the shoulders and suspenders who is on CNN at the same time.

3. as out of touch as i am with new music these days (and by these days, i mean since the early 90's) i have somehow managed to become obsessed with a band that doesn't suck like the rest of them. the kings of leon are coming to these parts nov 10th and thanks to a one mr. pincus we got balla seats at dar constitution hall. can't wait. actually.

4. i feel like i gotta throw this one up here before it starts to get cold outside and i totally forget about these things, but all summer long after bike riding whilst listening to kings of leon and rachel maddow podcasts i found myself frequenting the corner of 16th and irving for delicious helados from icee me. these suckers are only $1 for a small and $3 for a grande and they have a gazillion flavors to chose from, but you should have the wild cherry. i still have a coupon for a free helado that has been riding around in my wallet all summer if there are any takers?

5. and lastly, im gonna have to say that my most favorite thing right now is just really focusing on being the best executive career professional that i can be. times are tough, and in a city like this it really got me thinking ... some people are settling down, some people are settling and some people refuse to settle for anything less than executive career professionals.

putting the weekend to bed

if you ever find yourself in the Columbia Heights (or its red-headed [and thus hotter] stepsister, Mount Pleasant) area, may i heartily recommend my new favorite dive bar, The Raven, at 3125 Mt. Pleasant St.? tonight was our first foray there, but between cheap beer, a big screen showing the Giants-Steelers game, a BYO food policy, and a jukebox featuring (among others) Patsy Cline, The Cure, the Rushmore soundtrack, and plenty of Dylan (not to mention, was that a Scrabble board i saw on the back shelf?), i'm borderline convinced we've got a new haunt for the winter...

Santana Moss is a certified balla, but i probably didn't need to tell you that. even if Billick can't pronounce his first name to save his life. by the way, between that and Pam Oliver hoping that her crazy-ass jacket would distract people from the fact that she couldn't remember half of what she had talked to Tom Coughlin about 30 seconds earlier, someone needs to call Rupert Murdoch and remind him we have a financial crisis going on, and cutbacks have to start somewhere...

oh, and fyi, in case you needed more proof that every cute guy you've ever met in DC is probably not as interested in you as he is in the guy next to you, Andrew Sullivan has taken the liberty of confirming your fears. (note to Danielle: don't read this.) in a totally unrelated note, the Dupont drag race is this Tuesday!...

lastly, before this blogger (ha!) calls it quits for the weekend, i just started reading Steven Pinker's latest, The Stuff of Thought (excerpt from the book on the New Republic site here.) i bought it the same way i bought the last ten books i've read, which is to say i get sucked into the culture nexus that is Politics & Prose and then spit back out 20 minutes later and 50 dollars poorer. anyway, i'm only 12 pages in, but so far, i'm a fan....

ok, happy end of the weekend! t-minus five days to Halloween, start teasing your Sarah Palin wigs now!

five things i can't get enough of right now

1. Michael Lewis. it's been a while since i read Moneyball and The Blind Side, but his commentary on Bloomberg a couple days ago reminded me of how great he is.

2. Taqueria Distrito Federal. so good and so cheap, in the Central American "tres tacos" tradition. once the market bounces back (any day now!), i'm cashing in my 401k, franchising one of these babies at 18th and Columbia, keeping it open until 4am, and laughing as Julia goes down in flames. for now though, it's a Co. Heights/Petworth hidden gem.

3. ATTEND at the Kennedy Center. if you're under 25, this program is pretty fly. we saw Ivan Fischer conduct the NSO featuring Steven Isserlis in a Haydn cello concerto on Friday, second row orchestra seats for ten bucks. hard to beat. Frost/Nixon in two weeks should be good, too. pre-gaming the Kennedy Center is the new pre-gaming crappy frat parties, and the chances of ending the event with the walk of shame are much lower (no guarantees.)

4. the Washington Redskins coaching staff. instant Halloween costume: speed skates, a coyote fur jacket, an unlined baby face, and a general air of Buddha-like enlightenment. alternately, if you're too low on funds to buy a viola, brush up on your ability to make trenchant metaphors about pregnancy, old cars, fine wines, and urination and go as Greg Blache. this Halloween, be the change you wish to see in your Washington Redskins.

5. IZZEesque. i just had one of these at the Whole Foods in Tenleytown and it was balla. it tastes like the regular Izze and it manages to be low cal whilst also (probably) not giving you cancer (read: no aspartame).

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